ITS KILLING ME

i dont know what's wrong wit me...what i know is tat i REALLY HATE this feeling..how can i ever describe this feeling. its really killing me... kenapa nie tasha....!!!! YA ALLAH, y this feeling? y? i tot i will never experience it again..i cant believe its haunting me back. is this KARMA?

what are you!! i dont like this so called unstable mood n feeling. damn it. plis....im not mad at anyone,angry or anything.yeah maybe this is what i've been going through..BREAK DOWN. even an luxury expensive machine can break down how come i didnt stand a chance to accept tat im going through BREAK DOWN?

what i can say now is that, I WANNA CRY SO BAD...REALLY BAD! even now..my tears r falling.. i need my best fren so bad so i can cry on her shoulder. i wan my hana..she can make me smiles in seconds. i wanna hang out n sleep over wit all my cronies. chatting,putting mask on each other, gossiping about our love life, play a cathcy song n dance till we drop.
I ADMITTED I AM A WOMEN TAT CANT STAND A TINY LONELINESS......its not an easy confession to be made by a women itself. but tats doesnt mean tat i am an attention seeker but i've always need that SOMEONE. i dont wan to be the one that cry the loudest,i hate being alone. ALONE where u feel all the silent. silent kills me because it scream the truth...

when loneliness appears, the only thing i want to do sooo bad is get myself busy doing things i dont even wanna remember, doing things that can make my this annoy feeling go away, make things tat i will regret in my future,make things tat i dont even like n after all tat stupid actions..i will realize i've affected all the people around me.im sorry if this BEHAVIOUR is going to be a constant BEHAVIOUR u will have to handle in future. the blame is on me.

i think there more than life than just chasing all this these temporary HIGH to satisfied me. im sorry for all this mess confused unmoral confession post....it happened all the time. i dont have the strenght to control over it n it goes the other way round.



i wish i am not natasha lai. yea.i mean it. i wish no one know me n loves me coz by the end of the day i know i will only break their heart.

hormone OH hormone!!!!

aku benchik kau hormone...arrghhh! ang punya pasai aku kena dok mcm pmpn gila mengkrekotkan diri atas katil tanpa suara selain suara ARRGHHH!! sakit la bodo. well kena la dia visit aku setiap bulan tanpa henti dan bosan. itu memang xdapat dinafikan.

aku gagah jgk nk new post sbb aku dh xtaw nk buat apa atas katil nie.sat skt sat xskt.sat tu skt sampai tahap rs mcm nk kuaq anak sorang. pttlah SYURGA tu dibawah tapak kaki ibu..apa kena mgena lak nie.aku dh mula mrpek. disini aku menulis post nie smbil makan laksa dan secawan kofi kacip fatimah dan dimana DIET ini sgt xsihat bagi aku sekarang nie.awat la ang nie ssh dgq ckp tasha oiii.....

YA ALLAH...sakitnya Tuhan ja taw. rs mcm nk ambik pisau n toreh2 perot aku n kuaqkan binatang yg menyebabkan kesakitan itu. pain...plis go away...plis...im begging u..plis..T_T

*******ubat menstrual pink tu mmg xberkesan bg aku!! daymn it. T_T********